Thursday, 30 September 2010

Now That You Found Yourself Losing Your Mind Are You Here Again?

I left through Mrs Mulberry’s back gate as arranged and ran up to the top of the entry to take a juke round the corner onto the street to look for that peeler. Just as I did he exited my house with Kimba following close behind. She was nodding non-stop and really quick. She smoked her feag right to the cork and lit another one. I stared at her hard, nearly stared a hole though her, and tried to telepathically communicate with her to stop acting so strung out. A look of concern and pity passed over the peeler’s face and when he turned to head back up the street again I noticed that it was unmistakably Pigcop Stevenson who done me for blasphemous vandalism a few weeks back.

I ran a little way back up the entry again and hid behind a wheelie bin. I peeked my head out over the top of the bin to see that he passed. Once he was halfway across the top of the entry he stopped, put his nose in the air, and breathed in deeply. He did it again then shook his head and walked on.

I let a couple of minutes pass then ran round to my house. Kimba was out the back sitting on her arse on the grass with a big Minnie Mouse towel between her spread legs that were placed at a 90degree angle. There were blood all over the towel, over Minnie especially. It was as if Goffy had come up and, with a revolver, blown Micky’s brains out all over her face.
- What’s the matter, you silly cunt? – I asked.
- I’m bleeding out, Danny! I think you may have really done some damage to me. I think you’ve tore my innards out.
- Don’t be darft! The bleedings stopped now. Look. Sayin that it’ll take more than one of your tampons to stem that flow if it comes again. You’d probably need to stick one of your Ugg boots up there.
- There’s nothing else goin up me that’s bigger than a dick, or at most a fist.

She started to cry then.
- I think I might really miss them as well.
- Miss them? Our babies? - I said. – You can’t miss what you never had.
- But I’ve had them forming inside me for so many months and weeks, I feel like I’ve had something removed. Something vital.
- Nah. Wait till your later years. When you got tumours attached to your kidneys like limpets on a rock. Then you’ll put things in perspective.
- That doesn’t make any sense.
- What I mean is tumours on your kidneys are gonna kill you. Children, 3 of em, and all they’ll cost you, you may as well be dead, especially with your prospects. So both things are better removed. The difference between tumours and children is that the host attaches an undue amount of emotional attachment to the latter.
- Here, - I said, - listen to this, - I said putting my I-pod in her ears and putting it onto a track she liked:

Then I said as I turned up the volume for her, - After you listen to that I’ll tell you all about my morning with Mrs Mulberry.

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